I was talking to a few different women this week who all mentioned experiencing the same emotions; hurt, anger, self doubt and happiness. These are all common emotions, though few are unwilling to openly admit. We are going through the same emotions. So you are not crazy. You’re totally normal.
Being a single parent, whether by choice or circumstance, is hardly a easy road. We’re dealing with real situations that most of us don’t have the luxury of going to a friend or parent for advice with. I’m no expert, I mean who wants to be an expert in motherhood, right, but in my 13 years of single parenting, I have learned to master my emotions as not to scare, confuse or push away my child.
Today I’m going to give you a few ways to deal with all these damn emotions.
- Let them happen. Don’t try to shut them off. You’re human and things happen and as a single parent there’s plenty of room the let them. When you get angry, feel that anger. Go to another part of the house or outside for a walk to calm down. Yell, clean, write or whatever you have to do to feel it, but feel it.
- Identify the root cause. Why are you angry or sad or worried? What happened to make you feel this way? Who? Answering these questions helps you to better understand your current emotions and to develop a healthy way to reduce them.
- Stop comparing yourself to other moms that look like they got it together. I’m not saying we don’t, but to envy only makes more room for those feelings of sadness and self doubt. Every child is different and you have to develop your own way of parenting, a way that best benefits your family. You’re not gonna get that looking at her.
- All the negative things he says about you are not about you.
- Find your tribe, women with whom you share common interests with are so important to the journey of single motherhood. Don’t take that for granted.
- Trust yourself. Remember, you’re doing what’s best for your family. If you think you made the wrong decision, so will your kids.
Listen sis, you got this. You don’t need a magazine or even this blog to tell you this, just keep going.